Realized Predicaments

Conscience... Richard gave a quiet 'hm' in response, not sure how to approach the subject. In his opinion, having a conscience and consulting it was a good thing - but when it started to keep one awake at night, like it seemed to in Esha's case, it was best to ignore it's nagging voice. What was done, wouldn't come undone anyway, and being plagued by regrets and haunted by ghosts of the past was counterproductive.

And sometimes, life presented no option that would allow one to keep their conscience clear.

Before he could come up with words to offer that point of view to Esha in a palatable way, though, she spoke up again, and he tilted his head slightly. How fitting, really... she was making her life hard by choosing to feel guilty about whatever it was that she'd done. Choosing to dwell on the past, rather than focusing on the present.

For a moment, he remained silent, tapping his fingers against the table to the beat of a certain song.

"Sure. However," he finally said. "once you are king, you should be concerned with ruling, rather than with how you got the throne." He furrowed his brows a bit and looked at her inquisitively. "But why did you bring that up? Is there a knot of that kind present in your life?"

Ruling a kingdom..."It's recommended that you don't build your house on sand.." She said with a drum of fingers on the table.

If she was still guilty, then wasn't she surely couldn't be such a bad person. It was 90 years ago after all...History had forgotten, people had forgotten. She was the only one to remember what had happened. It could be lost in the sands of time if she let it go- hadn't she been guilty long enough?

She suddenly smiled to herself as she realized it. Stupid, stupid, stupid. One of the trademarked Esha smiles that hadn't really appeared in a while.

"A knot...yep, I think that's it. I have really good friends here and I'm not sure what to do. I usually move on by now out of habit" She sighed "But I don't want to. It's a bit unsettling what this place has done to me. In short, stay or go." She laughed a little breathily, at the fact she was having this problem...What happened to her in the months she'd been here? Miracles surely, what happened to the girl that vanished into the middle of the night without any issues?

A house on sand? How did that tie in...? He stared off, puzzled, at his glass as he tried to figure out what did Esha mean. Her thought process wasn't the easiest to follow.

After a moment, he snickered and shook his head, leaning back in his chair. "I'm sorry, dear, I got lost on the sea of metaphors." As he registered what she just said, his amused expression changed into that of concern. "Wait, you're thinking of leaving?"

She said 'out of habit'; but whatever it was that weighed on her conscience surely had to do with it. Maybe she felt she didn't deserve the friends she made, maybe staying had her facing demons from her past... But whether or not he was guessing right did not affect what he had to tell her.

"If you feel like going away would make you happier, do it." He smiled weakly. "But if you're still having doubts, I'd say you should stay. You can pack up and leave any day, should you ever be completely sure that's what you want."

Esha laughed a little. "No need for swimming lessons. I think that's the last of them. Bit out of my depth here too" She chuckled and tapped her foot against the floor a few times.

"Thinking off is about right, but no. I never stay anywhere for more than 6 or 7 months and now instead of 'what time in the night to leave?' It's 'Are these special enough circumstances to stay?'. Confusing to say the least." She said lamely whilst grimacing a little, she had to admit it did sound like a pretty easy problem. "Would you miss me or something?" She said jokingly

It wasn't, apart from being deeply confusing to Esha it was stress she didn't deal with well. She wasn't bored with the place, it was doubtful she'd ever be. She stared off for a few seconds

She suddenly smiled widely "But I got over the fact I was older than most of the student grandparents, I can get over this, no?" She laughed it off, tried to hide the fact that it was a big issue at the time. It was incredibly alienating to her. She didn't really realize how old she was until coming here.

He nodded with a wry smile, understanding all too well. Not only wasn't he fond of staying too long in one place, either - not to mention the risks that carried - but sometimes, being at the school put him in situations he'd really prefer to avoid. And yet, he was still there, and still not sure if it wouldn't end up being the stupidest thing he'd ever done.

Lillegard had a way of making one not want to leave.

Shaking off those rather unsettling thoughts, he chuckled. "Well, maybe I would. You relative normalcy is quite refreshing, I'll admit." His smile turned a bit sad as he shrugged. "But yes, it is something you simply get used to. I find that adapting is one of the most, if not the most, useful skills one can possess. Evolve or die. And when you're immortal, well..." He grinned. "What choice do you have?"

Poor kid was evidently going through a particularly unpleasant bout of 'evolution'. That, too, seemed to happen there often. Being surrounded by such an eclectic mix of creatures, with their varying beliefs, attitudes and natures, one had to keep an open mind.

The sides of Esha's mouth quirked a little, normal? No many people called her that. Only in a place like lillegard could she really be called that . After a century a few little quirks could be forgiven surely?

"When you say 'evolve' it's like you talk about hundreds of years. Though that does seem likely considering how I got this way....I wonder if someone will invent something, like floating cars or an accidental disease that kills everyone. I look froward." She chuckled a little at the thought of floating cars, born before cars were slower than walking- but living to the days when they didn't even touch the ground? That would be so satisfying.

Esha wasn't sure how she felt about that. "Oh wait-" She rectified "The robots, not the human race dying out. I'd have nobody to talk to." She winced a little dramatically at the last bit, like dogsbody in a pantomime would so even the back of the hall would see an expression. "How Boring, and there would be no takeaways. I would starve." She said shrugging. It wasn't a big shame to her, not being kitchen friendly, but it was damn inconvenient sometimes.

At first he stared at Esha a little perplexed, but after she cleared up what she meant, he smiled.

"Indeed. Watching technology progress is fascinating... If a bit hard to swallow, sometimes." He coughed. "Flying machines, moving pictures, the whole bloody Internet. It's quite mind-blowing. It's another thing that one needs to adapt to." Some older beings found the changes impossible to accept. There were rumors of vampires committing suicide after the world they were used to was too far gone; surely it happened to other species as well... Richard sighed quietly. "Yes, the world would be quite empty without humans, wouldn't it? But I'm sure some other kind of sapient creatures would survive such a disease, so it wouldn't be completely desolate. Perhaps they would pick up the... spatula and make burgers instead."

He chuckled a little, but it faded quickly as a sudden uneasiness struck him. He shot a wary glance into the dark expanse of the garden, but of course nothing was there. It was nothing. With a shrug, he reached for the glass of juice and drank a little.

"So, yes. Knowing that you're not completely dependent on humanity for your sustenance is a relief, no?"

"I think I´ve adjusted well enough considering all. Even to cars. I was only born 1901 so those things were already made in primitive form. First time I saw them was when the british army at start of world war one came to India to recruit. Used to burst the tires and ransack them for goods." She snickered a little and said it without censor, unaware that it might have been offense¡ve if Richard wanted to take it that way. She was seen as a disease to the officers anyway. Heavy pockets to pick if one was able.

Delusionally, some officers thought they could stride in and clean up the darker part of the city. They thought it somehow was some duty considering India was part of the British empire. Nobody took them seriously.

Esha shook her head a little "You wouldn´t happen to be comparing them to food would you?" She was actually vegetarian, so no burgers for her. Indian also, she wouldn´t even dream of eating a cow. Too sacred, funny how every other moral seemed to slip a bit and she still wouln´t eat meat.

Moving on she said- "I hope they arent too sapient...They would start to reject me as thier goddess. No more offerings for me- I´d get by somehow, hook ar crook" Esha made a little mix between an´ugfff´and a sigh. Demurely as ever. She turned to stone and posed a little for a matter of seconds. Like those greek ancient statues. Scarily so, all that pretending to be a statue meant she could do it easily "You would have accept this as a god figure?"

A small huff of surprise escaped him at her words. Right, okay... Kids would be kids, they had their reasons, and it was ancient history, anyway... but he couldn't help a small jolt of exasperation somewhere deep within. Disregarding it, and deciding it was better to gloss over the subject, he leaned back in his chair as he shook his head and smiled innocently. "Of course not."

Was she even aware of him being what he was? He wasn't sure. If she didn't know, well, there was no real need for her to.

Richard stared at her for a moment, then one corner of his mouth crooked a little. "No, I wouldn't, for I shalt not commit idolatry." He spoke in a lightly chastising tone for some reason. "But yes, quite well done, regardless..." he trailed off, still trying to make sense of what she said. Too sapient to have a goddess...? She has had offerings made to her? Finally, he conceded defeat with a sigh that turned into a chuckle, and looked to the girl curiously. "Are you saying you work part-time as an image of god?"